The Tyler’s Tongue

A tramp stopped a Mason on his way to a lodge meeting. The Mason, being of charitable disposition, offered food, a warming drink, and a seat in the lodge for the evening. The tramp declined, explaining with dignity that he never smoked, never drank, and had never entered a Masonic lodge.

After the meeting, the Mason found the tramp still waiting outside, and offered him £250 to follow him home. A fellow Brother, overhearing this, pulled him aside with some alarm and asked what on earth he thought he was doing. He replied: “I want my wife to see what happens to a man who doesn’t drink, doesn’t smoke, and hasn’t joined the Masons.”

Quiz: Nickname Suggestions

Napoleon, Waldorf, Rumpole, Greybeard — do you know who they are in the Lodge? Our competition for the next edition is to provide nickname suggestions for each member of the Lodge.

Overheard at a Recent Festive Board

“Freemasonry makes good men better; it does not, however, make us better drivers.” — “Ah yes,” came the reply, “but that’s because we don’t have our wives in the car telling us every turn to make, what speed we should be going, and how we should behave in the current traffic conditions.”